Monthly Archives: October 2014

Note to my soon to be ex-girlfriend.

My Girlfriend,

How are you? I believe you are already asleep. In bed & decided to share this letter I wrote you on the 18th of August, 2014 with the entire world. However I have taken the liberty to tweak it a bit in order to preserve yours in its purest form.

I have known you since 2008 & liked you from 2009. Your relationship with that Yoruba boy prevented me from getting closer as I did not want to ‘snatch’ you from him, being the considerate fellow I tend to be. Thankfully, I got that chance on 31st March, 2013, a date which has become our ‘anniversary.’

I believed on that day that I was going to end up as your husband especially as Yoruba boy was out of the way. All that was necessary was to show you how I intended to do so.

It has been a brilliant 1 year, 6 months, 2 weeks & 3 days so far. A period within which we have laughed & cried, loved & almost hated each other (if we haven’t hated each other at some point already), & other roller-coaster of emotions. It has not been an easy road to walk, I didn’t realise loving you could be so hard. I have had to scream my lungs out on some occasions trying to get you to understand me. I have fought many battles in this period, some I have won, others I have lost outright & some where we just have a truce without changing the status quo.

Things I love about you & consider to rank as your best qualities are your spirit of generosity & kindness. You know how to give selflessly. I thought I was a generous fellow till I met you & realised I am a ‘learner.’ Yes, you are kind; you care about people even when you try to appear uninterested in them.

The most important though is your sense of family. I discovered that as time went on & find it a great & sexy asset. You are also not ‘high maintenance’ & for that I am truly grateful though you have some real upper-class taste buds.

What I dislike most – your stubborn spirit. OSARETIN AMENA STEPHANIE ERHAHON is a very stubborn girl!!! How one person can be so stubborn beats me. You are so stubborn it is mind-boggling. Even though you have learnt to say sorry more & surprising me in the process (is this attributed to the side-effects of wedding preparations?), you are sha still stubborn…END OF DISCUSSION.

Certain events from after you said YES on the 23rd of December, 2013 through to our proposed event of 18th October, 2014 have raised doubts in my mind about the purpose of this journey. I have often wondered in my quiet moments if I truly want to give up my ‘freedom’ & be bound in this eternal marriage to you. Is it worth it? Shouldn’t I just end this whole thing now? Better to have a failed relationship than a failed marriage, right? There are so many questions and very few answers if any at all.

From the little I have seen from marriages of my very experienced seniors & close friends, it is hard work being married. The fights they get into could be scary & to think on the occasions I ‘report’ you, what I hear is “You haven’t seen anything yet” & I am like, “Na wetin be this then? So this one no be something?” I ask myself if I want to do this for the rest of my life. The positive side is that a lot of them married people are still together & the number of divorces & separations are fewer so it sure is worthwhile.

It is the morning of our wedding in the way of our fathers & a day to church ceremony & thereafter commence our ‘forever’ journey. Being a husband & a father, an in-law to your folks & learning to remember that it is not my people or your people but our people. I cannot promise you a smooth ride. I cannot promise to transform into a Superman overnight. What I can promise is to always give it my best shot; to always be there for you & our children; to put you & them first; to always love you like it is the first time & just be a good man.

So in less than 39 hours you will become my ex-girlfriend & become my wife & helpmate. I pray that GOD grants you the grace to do all you ought to & equip you to be a better woman. I pray that you be a beautiful sister to my siblings & a dutiful daughter to my dad & above all, a wonderful wife & an excellent mother.

I love you, my soon-to-be ex-girlfriend. I will love you even more, my soon-to-be wife.

Yours forever,


17th October, 2014.